As I said earlier on that, I want to start a series of funny stories from my Call Centre days so here is the first one.
This was my first proper job, I was working for Sky TV (which for those not in the UK is the Satellite TV provider for the country) and I was working in the “New Business” department where I would make new accounts for new customers, set their packages and arrange for install dates.
I worked the backshift so I was on until 11 pm at night and one night I got a call about half 9, and it went like this.
Me: Good evening you’re through to sky, Colin Speaking how can I help you?
Cust: I want to cancel my account.
*internally* stupid idiot just blew my conversion he’s come to the wrong department.
Me: Ok sir you have come through to the wrong department for that, but if you give me your details I will pass you to the correct department.
*gets details and brings up account*
*Looking at the account I see that it was only installed that day*
Me: Sir, I can see that you only had it installed today, can I ask why you would like to cancel your account? Is there something wrong with the package?
Cust: No, No that’s great lots of channels, more than I thought.
Me: is there something wrong with the Signal? The Picture?
Cust: No absolutely not that’s all perfect.
Me: Ok sir then do you mind if I ask why you want to cancel?
Cust: Well son you see I came home from work today, and I turned on the tv checked out the package then I went upstairs and found the engineer that came to install it in bed with my wife!
Me: *stunned silence* Eh…
Cust: Yeah I found this bastard in MY BED SCREWING MY WIFE.
Me: Ok sir, Let me just put you on hold and I’ll transfer you to the correct department/
*puts the customer on hold and bursts out laughing, everyone looks at me, so I tell them what happened. I take a moment to compose myself and then transfer the call to the correct department*
*I explain to the guy the situation, he laughs*
Cancellation Guy: Did you tell the customer that we will have to send out another engineer to uninstall everything?
Me: Nope, I thought I’d leave that for you.
Cancellation Guy: Thanks for that.
Me: No problem.
*conference call to cust*
Me: Hi Sir, thanks for holding, sorry about the wait there, I’m transferring you to the cancellations team, good luck with your problem.
*Hangs up and laughs*
This was my first situation like this, and it made me laugh so hard, this was about 14 years ago, and I still remember it almost word perfect.
We had a running joke in the team with one of the women who was a bit slutty, that we would send her round to customers when the ordered “Sky+” so I had to fight so hard not to ask the guy if it was “Sky+ that he had ordered”
So this is the first instalment of “Tales From the Call Centre” I hope this has given you a laugh.